Here’s why I chose music, what I learned on my healing journey, and 5 ways you can do it too.
After coming out of a hole of back-to-back stress for a few years, I forgot what I used to do to make myself happy. I went to my favorite concerts at the Hollywood Bowl every summer, which is a classic L.A. tradition, but it still hadn’t dawned on me how important seeing live music was to me until I moved to the Bay Area (Northern California).
Within days of moving here, I had tickets to see Eric Roberson. I was playing “Lessons” on repeat at the time, and quite frankly, Eric could sing the items on a Dollar Tree receipt and make you swoon. That man is gold and worth every moment. I was even more excited to finally see all the shows happening here that I was jealous of as a concert-goer in Southern California.
In the midst of my stress chaos a few years back, my therapist asked me a very simple question:
“What makes you happy?”
I sat with that question for years. It wasn’t obvious to me at all, even though music was always right there. On one random day in 2022, I finally connected the dots: live music performances are the one thing I look forward to with excitement, and it makes me genuinely happy.
So what does an overachiever who finally has her time back to herself do? She makes up a challenge to see 99 performances in one year. Here’s how I did it and how I let it lead me through my healing journey (with tips for you too.)
1. Location, Location, Location is Key
I live in the Bay Area. There are five concert venues within walking distance of where I live. There are even more venues in surrounding cities (looking at you, San Francisco, Berkeley, and San Jose). My access to live music is ridiculously abundant. Every week it was easy to find a performance to go to, and that’s exactly what I did. Here’s what you can do:
Subscribe to artists, events & venue notifications
Follow concert halls, theaters, festival producers, and your favorite artists to add to your calendar. Don’t sleep on non-traditional venues like parks.
Use SongKick & Spotify for recommendations
At some point, you’ll wish you had an assistant for this. Consider these two as helpful resources for browsing shows by genre and location.
Make it an excursion or an excuse to build community
Let the music lead you to more performance-dense areas, or find a community of local music lovers near you (online or offline).
2. Cheat code: Individual performances at festivals and online performances count.
I went to two festivals that I had on my bucket list: Essence Festival and The Roots Picnic. One additional festival popped up with a dream lineup that I couldn’t miss: Blue Note Napa Jazz Festival. I knocked out quite a bit of my count with those festivals. Madison McFerrin had a special virtual reality/metaverse concert where she streamed a live performance she did in New York. It was worth being the only online performance add to the list. This is also the cheat code on cost. Here are some tips to save money:
Plan and pay for your festival plans early
Stack your money and save on costs. If you plan to travel or hit multiple festivals, take advantage of early bird sales and buy your flight and hotels as soon as possible.
Online performances are still happening
Between Instagram, Twitch, and YouTube, you might find your favorite artist streaming, or you can host a streaming party with friends for festivals like Coachella or Dreamville.
Use Airbnb Experiences
When I was in New Orleans, I booked a Jazz Club Tour hosted by a local musician that guided me to at least 3-4 performances in one night. All I had to do was bar hop.
3. All types of music performances mattered.
The 2023 Grammy Award-Winning Tennessee State University Marching Band at EssenceFest, the DJs I followed on Twitch at their in-person sets, and the local community Blues band performing at a fundraiser event: all counted as performances on the list. Opening acts counted too. It wasn’t about the name; it was about the performance. That helped me appreciate the impact of music and the artist’s work. It was also a practice of being conscious of the music around me. Consider this in your plans:
Count performances in non-music-centered events
Music is everywhere: sports games, ceremonies, community events, and street fairs. Someone is performing, and that performance counts.
Go to Sofar Sounds for a curated surprise experience
Sofar Sounds presents great musicians that are either new or potentially familiar to you– and that’s the catch. It’s all a pleasant surprise, and so is the venue.
Support your local curators & music enthusiasts
One of my favorite events was DAM Events, where a whole showcase of local talent performed. Look for locally-produced events to catch a vibe too.
4. I was committed. (Sometimes overly committed.)
I bought tickets swiftly. If I were in another city for a festival, I would buy more tickets to see performances nearby. I had to go to work in another country. I bought tickets for performances while I was in another country. I bought tickets to shows I forgot I bought tickets to. Bought tickets to shows I didn’t make it to. Sometimes it was exhausting but it was still worth the effort. A few tips:
Prioritize what’s important
I would be OK if I never go to a chain restaurant, movie theater, or [insert any standard suburban night out activity here]. My spare time and money went to music. Period.
Don’t overthink it. Just go!
I went to 98% of these events by myself. I saw people that I knew already and met new people when I got there. I treated it as if I were going to a movie by myself.
Use proximity to your advantage
If you traveled to Portland, see if there’s a show to go to in Vancouver or Seattle. Consider all transit options, trains, rental cars, and cheap flights to double your footprint to the nearest city.
5. I embraced my musical range.
My concert policies are to go to performances for artists I want to hear more from, always buy tickets to see legends, and buy tickets to the artists that have ubiquitously been a part of my life’s soundtrack. This meant I had plenty of options. T-Pain, Kenny Garrett, Morcheeba, Dianne Reeves, Koffee, D-Nice…I rarely ran out of shows I was interested in. I love Jazz, Hip-hop, R&B, Soul, Rock, alternative genres, some Folk, and Electronic. Here’s how to widen your range of possibilities:
Pay attention to your fringe genres
Most of us have music that we all dig but isn’t of our everyday genre. It could be orchestral, operatic, or maybe you need more spoken word. Lean into it and include those too.
Give your favorites their flowers
I consider making an effort to see a live performance one of the ways we support our favorite artists. If you ever had a good time or recall their music always being a part of your life, show up for them.
See people you haven’t heard before
Performances from artists I’ve never heard of before were a great experience. They were sometimes better than people I had heard of before. It’s refreshing to discover people just getting started.
My Results:
- Lalah Hathaway
- Gerald Bradshaw
- Frank McComb
- Nicholas Payton
- Jonathan Pinson
- Rahsaan Patterson
- Philharmonik
- Ian Santillano
- Lily Waters
- Marquis Hill
- DJ Nina Sol
- Cowboy & His Sometimes Blues Band
- Marcus Machado ft. Martin Luther McCoy, Mara Hruby
- Bilal
- DJ MRE
- Mr. Davey D
- Slum Village
- Yussef Dayes
- Angie Stone
- Walter Earl Group
- Logan Richards ft. Ambrose Akinmusire
- Dianne Reeves
- Kindred
- Coco and Breezy
- Arya Starr
- Koffee
- Willie Jones and Renee Neuville (formerly of Zhané)
- Ravi Coltrane
- Austin Antoine
- Moonchild
- Mack Keane
- Alex Isley
- Alfa Mist
- Stanley Clarke
- Young Cash
- Erica Banks
- T-Pain
- Res
- Masego
- DJ D-Nice
- Babyface Ray
- Serpentwithfeet
- Ambré
- Black Thought
- Rick Ross
- Benny the Butcher
- J Period
- Rakim
- DJ Jazzy Jeff
- Tierra Whack
- Mumu Fresh
- Tye Tribbett
- Tank and the Bangas
- Kirk Franklin
- Kenny Garrett
- Qing Qi
- Madison McFerrin
- The Caesar Brothers
- Amanda Rose Band
- Cory Henry
- Janet Jackson
- Jasmine Sullivan
- Doug E. Fresh
- Patti Labelle
- TSU Marching Band
- Mannie Fresh
- Wonway Possibul
- Khruangbin
- Patrice Rushen
- DJ Quik
- Raheem Devaughn
- Emily King
- Black Star (Talib Kweli & Yasiin Bey)
- Robert Glasper
- Goapele
- Corrine Bailey Rae
- Flying Lotus
- Thundercat
- Maxwell
- Ledisi
- Terrace Martin
- Calvin Keys
- Raheem Devaughn
- Katalyst
- JAZZ IS DEAD: Adrian Younge & Ali Shaheed
- Brian Jackson
- Doug Carn
- Henry Franklin
- Baby Keem
- Tana Leone
- Kendrick Lamar
- Brainstory
- Nicole Wray
- Morcheeba
- DJ Logic ft. Billy Martin & Reed Mathis
- Ranky Tanky & Lisa Fischer
- Yuna
- Jacob Banks
- PJ Morton
Cities
- Oakland, CA
- San Francisco, CA
- San Jose, CA
- Napa (St. Helena), CA
- Philadelphia, PA
- New York, NY
- New Orleans, LA
- Stockholm, Sweden
(The highlights are artists I was super excited to see.)
My Top 9 of the 99:
9. DJ Logic ft. Billy Martin
& Reed Mathis
8. Khruangbin
7. Yussef Dayes
6. Tie: Ravi Coltrane & Dianne Reeves
5. Terrace Martin
4. PJ Morton
3. Ranky Tanky & Lisa Fischer
2. Rashaan Patterson
1. Kendrick Lamar
You might be wondering where the healing part comes in after all the music and traveling I did.
When I was at Eric Roberson’s show, I teared up a little bit as I sang along to “Lessons” quietly to myself. I didn’t expect that, but it showed me I was still a little raw from the journey that led me to the point of needing healing. (A lot happened back to back from 2018-2021).
Seven months later, I got to The Roots Picnic. I remember journaling about how happy I was to finally do something I always wanted to do. I’m in a city I respect for its Black music, history, and culture, and I had the freedom to enjoy myself how I saw fit. It was the first time I truly felt my freedom, and I was finally living the quiet parts of myself out loud and independently. Here’s what I learned when I paid attention to how I felt:
Be more conscious of what’s in front of you and what you minimize in your mind.
Most things you enjoy quietly or don’t think are a big deal are probably the things you need to pay attention to more intentionally in your life. That also reminded me to be grateful for all artists. The artists we don’t go to shows to see, the artists who are still finding their way, and the artists that are sharing their gifts to shape our environment when they aren’t the main event.
You’re free.
When you’re in relationships with people (any kind of relationship), you’re constantly considering someone else in your decision-making and anticipating how to deal with their response to your wants and needs. The feeling of just doing what you want, when you want, how you want, where you want — was something I hadn’t experienced fully yet. You can hear yourself better when you’re not thinking of someone else, but will you listen?
Let the little things lead you to something big.
Making up a challenge for myself gave me no excuse to wait to do the things I’ve always wanted to do or travel to places I wanted to see. I wrote a list of places I wanted to travel to, I found a concert or festival that would take me there. Before I knew it, I found myself doing small bucket list things so I could make room for bigger ones.
What would you do more of in order to heal yourself?
Photo credit: Matheus Natan (Pexels)
